Healthy Conflict: The Secret Ingredient for Better Results
When you hear the word conflict, what comes to mind?
For many, conflict is seen as discomfort, tension, or confrontation, negative traits that are often viewed as harmful. If that’s you, it's understandable why you might shy away from difficult conversations. Many of us weren’t taught to see conflict as a constructive element. Most of what many people witness as conflict growing up likely ended in turmoil and possibly even lasting emotional pain…so we instinctively avoid it as adults.
But, what if conflict isn’t the enemy we believe it to be? What if, instead, it’s the missing ingredient that could unlock greater innovation, enhance productivity, and foster deeper connections within your team? Embracing conflict as a catalyst for growth might just be the key to transforming your team’s dynamics and achieving extraordinary results.
What Is Healthy Conflict?
Healthy conflict helps build stronger, more creative relationships at work and in life. It means openly and respectfully sharing different ideas and concerns. Unlike personal attacks, it encourages honest discussions that challenge views and lead to better solutions.
In his book, Great at Work, Morten T. Hansen refers to this healthy conflict as ‘Fight and Unite’. Hansen writes, “When teams have a good fight..team members debate the issues, consider alternatives, challenge one another, listen to minority views, scrutinize assumptions, and enable every participant to speak up without fear of retribution.”
Cultivating healthy conflict means setting ground rules for communication: listening actively, seeking to understand before being understood, and addressing issues directly instead of allowing them to fester beneath the surface. When conflict is approached this way, it becomes a creative force; a crucible where ideas are tested, relationships are strengthened, and mutual understanding deepens.
Why Healthy Conflict Matters
While avoiding conflict might keep peace for a while, over time, it can inhibit growth, create resentment, and result in mediocre outcomes. Conversely, engaging in healthy conflict leads to:
Better decisions - because diverse viewpoints are shared.
Stronger relationships - as trust grows when disagreements are handled respectfully.
More innovation - from the clash of different ideas.
Greater resilience - teams that face conflict together become stronger.
The skill isn’t in avoiding conflict but in engaging with it effectively by approaching it with curiosity instead of defensiveness.
How Your Energy Shapes Conflict
Conflict is more than just words; it’s the energy you bring to every conversation. Many see energy as simply good or bad, but the truth is, it exists in levels. Once you understand these levels, you gain the power to choose your response rather than be controlled by it. The Energy Leadership® framework shows how your energy levels shape how you handle conflict. So, ask yourself: What level of energy are you leading with in conflict?
If you catch yourself avoiding, dominating, or shutting down, your default energy level may be holding you back. The good news is… YOU can shift it!
When you lead from higher energy levels with curiosity, empathy, and collaboration, conflict becomes a springboard for creativity and progress, not a dead end.
Imagine a Better Future
Take a moment and think of your current team. Is this team hesitating to engage in healthy conflict? Do they lack the ability to hold one another accountable? Is there a “we’ve always done it this way” mentality? Now, imagine your team welcomes healthy debate, where different opinions inspire creativity rather than silence. Imagine being able to increase collaboration for maximum productivity. Great news! This dynamic future is within your team’s reach, and it starts with one critical conversation. It starts with you. I wonder, what’s one conversation you’ve been putting off?
If you’re ready to evaluate your energy levels and learn how to adopt a healthy conflict mindset, explore my Energy Leadership® Index Assessment and Debrief package. Let’s unlock greater potential. Your future self will thank you.